Parenting Matters - May Article 2

PARTY PACK-IT IS – IT’S A REAL DISEASE!

Party Pack-itis? Yes, it’s official. It’s an inflammatory disease that attacks a materialistic generation of children causing an extraordinary sense of entitlement. Forget going to birthday parties with the primary aim of giving to the party girl or boy. Today’s young party goers, from preschool upwards, arrive with a sense of entitlement that screams out: “So how are you going to entertain me?” and “Show me the party pack!”

Party Pack-itis is a hot topic of debate among mothers. Instead of a small thought at the end of a party to say: “Thanks for coming,” the party pack has become the focus for the children and a headache for the mother organising the party. The expectation and competitiveness around the value and size of party packs has mobilised some groups of mothers to collectively decide to ban the issuing of party packs at their children’s parties. Good for them!

To cure Party Pack-itis, there are two things we must do:

Firstly, party hosts should return the party pack to its rightful place – a token gesture. In fact, let’s go back to calling them party favours. A party pack infers that there are a whole lot of goodies, whereas a party favour is really about just one thing. And, if you are providing chips, sweets and drinks at the party, there is no need to send a repeat of the party fare home either – it’s boring and expensive. Children should eat at the party.

Secondly, we must aim to bring our children up with a sense of appreciation for the whole party experience, not just for the party pack they will be given on departure. Looking the host or hostess in the eye and saying: “Thank you very much for having me,” is a social skill that will stand them in good stead as they move on through life. Going to parties allows children, both big and small, to practice making eye contact and express their gratitude – meaningfully.

Move over party packs. Move in party favours. And goodbye Party Pack-itis!

NIKKI BUSH

Creative parenting expert, inspirational speaker and co-author of Future-proof Your Child (Penguin, 2008), and Easy Answers to Awkward Questions (Metz Press, 2009)

nikki@brightideasoutfit.co.za

http://www.brightideasoutfit.com/